But when he came to himself he said, “How many of my father’s hired hands have bread enough and to spare, but here I am dying of hunger! I will get up and go to my father … (Luke 15:17-18a)
It is to myself that you call me, dear Friend. And I return, home.
It is not a place, although this place of quiet is especially blessed to me, and I pray it will always be: a desk littered with papers, books partially read, notes for articles yet to be written, a red candle (of course), and the chant of gentle voices across the room.
This is the place of retreat where I come to find you … or shall I say where you find me … and take me home?
Love … is my home, which is to say you, my Lord, for what are you if not this Love that aches in me until I come here to be with you, alone?
You call me to come back to myself, to release all pretension, all effort, all striving and know one thing … this Love, you, who dwell within.
Life is a prodigal journey where we get lost. We lose ourselves, wasting ourselves, our years and talents, expending vast amounts of energy trying (much too hard) to be something other than what we are, something we imagine others require or demand or expect of us.
Being what we are not, we live far from the center of our souls, far from the deep, inner connection with the mystery of our own identity and the mystery of your indwelling. These two are one and the same. For what are we if not expressions of you who are Love, each so unique and precious?
To find love within is to find you. To feel the ache of love and the ache for love is to know you. To discover something that gives joy and frees you to give a piece of your heart back to this world … this is what it means to come to yourself, to remember and feel who you truly are and know: Love, this Holy Mystery living through the particular shape of your life.
Find what fills your heart and frees you to touch the world with grace. Let go of the delusion that you need to do or be anything else. You will know yourself … and the Love who lives in you … in the very same moment.
Love will take you home.
Pr. David L. Miller